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The Subversive Power of Knowing Your Own Mind

I recently was thrust unexpectedly and unwillingly back into the world of dating. As someone curious about human psychology, it’s been a fascinating gift of content and anthropologic insight. But as a human being with thoughts, feelings, needs, and wants – especially one conditioned as a cishet female – it is horrible. The actual dating (…)

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The Physics of Psychology

Today, we know that using a seatbelt prevents death, washing your hands prevents spreading disease and infection, and wearing a helmet prevents concussions. If someone you know bragged about never washing their hands, you would look at them with concern. And, yet, this is precisely what we do with psychology. We boast about never needing (…)

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Why We Don’t Tell People About Our Dreams

My first job after college was as a research assistant in a psychiatric research clinic. Part of my job was to conduct assessments of potential participants in our studies on major depression and anxiety. In psychiatry and psychology, since we lack reliable biometrics (for now), we’re reliant on self-report to get an assessment of your (…)

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On Failing Spectacularly and Why You Should

Last week I asked the Brainstorm Road waitlist about their dreams. Namely, why they don’t share them: What prevents you from sharing more (in public) about work that lights you up? I hypothesized the answers would be about belonging and rejection. How you don’t want to be mocked for your idea or you feel silly. (…)

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A Plea

Today I write with a plea. Don’t quit. I’m watching so many people around me turn to stone. They quit. They quit trying, chasing, wanting. They quit caring. Life has, understandably, taken them down. Life will always do its best to erode your soul and often it succeeds. I worry about people like us who (…)

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Meaningful Texts: Uses of The Erotic by Audre Lorde

It is possible that all the answers to life’s questions are in one book:  The Selected Works of Audre Lorde . If you’re unfamiliar with Lorde’s work, strap in because no one is more deliberate with words, discerning with ideas, and more cutthroat when it comes to truth-telling than Lorde. To read her is to see (…)

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Meaningful Text Series: The Choice by Dr. Edith Eva Eger

Good morning, I’m starting a new series called Meaningful Texts. It’s where I share an excerpt from a book that I found meaningful, in hopes that it inspires you to feel a little less alone. I hope you learn something, I hope you feel something, and I hope you see a part of yourself (or someone (…)

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Psychological Honesty: The Road To Self-Actualization

“But what do you WANT to write about?” I asked him again. He couldn’t answer. He said he wanted to write a book. But he was lying. Every answer was a well-thought-out formula. An idea that could be. A template. An approach. He was a strong writer in that he was great with words. He (…)

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Good Guys and Bad Guys

There are no good guys and bad guys. We’ll start with the punchline. I’ve tried really hard to divide the world into them. It would be easier if people were all good or all bad. EVIL VS VIRTUE. CRUEL VS KIND. LOVE VS HATE. JUSTICE VS INJUSTICE. None of these dichotomies are real. Often cruelty comes from (…)

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meaningful conversation outside two people talking camping thatseemsimportant

Can We Make Meaningful Converstion The Norm?

How was vacation? How was the movie? How is the new place? How was dinner? How was the date? How’s work? How’d it go? We don’t give real answers to these questions. We give dismissals: “It was fine. It was great. Oh, we had a blast!” “It was interesting, different, very unique.” The question I (…)

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