In response to the story I shared last week, many of you disparaged yourselves for not having the courage to say what I said. I realized I didn’t add an important distinction: That wasn’t courage. I rarely speak up when adults say inane and cruel things anymore. Not because I don’t want to, but because (…)
It hasn’t happened recently, but occasionally, I will publish a piece that evokes an: Are you ok? Should I be worried? First of all, yes, you should be worried about me as I am worried about you and the state of the world all day every day. It’s part of having been born Jewish. My (…)
You can’t save people who don’t want to be saved. You can pull them out of a bathtub, but you can’t *make* them want to live. To love someone is to let them sit in their own consequences. To risk losing them if they want to be lost.
I had a serious piece queued up for today about how you can’t save people who don’t want to be saved, but I’m in the mood for something lighter. Things in my world are heavy. Hope takes effort. I’m told this is a symptom of trauma, not depression. Depression displays anhedonia, which is the absence of pleasure (…)
Lately, I’ve been mulling over the courage it takes to be happy. Not the Instagram performance “happy.” Truly, sincerely, happy. There is significant research on happiness (Dr. Santo’s lab, The Happiness Research Institute, Dr. Ed’s Stuff, Shawn Anchor who is meh, Google Scholar pieces here, it’s ENDLESS). We know empirically that joy > happiness (one (…)
If there is one psychologist whose work has influenced my life more than anyone, it’s Dr. Harriet Lerner. And Dr. Ramani. And Dr. Eger. And Dr. Judith Herman. Ok, there are many. But if you don’t know who Dr. Lerner is, this podcast is a good place to start. Dr. Lerner’s book The Dance of Anger (terrible title, wonderful book) quite literally blew (…)
Dreaming is a topic we reserve for Kindergarten and elementary school. I move we upgrade this topic to an adult one because we’re making a royal mess of it lately. We’ve confused dreams with escapism and naivety. And we’ve normalized pedestaling the dreams of those who came before us over our own, resulting in outcomes (…)
Netflix has an autoplay feature that is both helpful and deeply annoying if you just want the TV on in the background and aren’t looking for a trailer of whatever you left your remote pointing at. I had just turned on Netflix when it recommended a series about Work to which I thought hmmm. I (…)