Posts by SeemsImportant
The Courage it Takes to Be Happy
Lately, I’ve been mulling over the courage it takes to be happy. Not the Instagram performance “happy.” Truly, sincerely, happy. There is significant research on happiness (Dr. Santo’s lab, The Happiness Research Institute, Dr. Ed’s Stuff, Shawn Anchor who is meh, Google Scholar pieces here, it’s ENDLESS). We know empirically that joy > happiness (one…
Read MoreMeaningful Text Series: The Dance of Anger by Harriet Lerner
If there is one psychologist whose work has influenced my life more than anyone, it’s Dr. Harriet Lerner. And Dr. Ramani. And Dr. Eger. And Dr. Judith Herman. Ok, there are many. But if you don’t know who Dr. Lerner is, this podcast is a good place to start. Dr. Lerner’s book The Dance of Anger (terrible title, wonderful book) quite literally blew…
Read MoreLivin the Dream (But Whose Dream Is It?)
Dreaming is a topic we reserve for Kindergarten and elementary school. I move we upgrade this topic to an adult one because we’re making a royal mess of it lately. We’ve confused dreams with escapism and naivety. And we’ve normalized pedestaling the dreams of those who came before us over our own, resulting in outcomes…
Read MoreThe False Dichotemy of Work and Fun
Netflix has an autoplay feature that is both helpful and deeply annoying if you just want the TV on in the background and aren’t looking for a trailer of whatever you left your remote pointing at. I had just turned on Netflix when it recommended a series about Work to which I thought hmmm. I…
Read MoreWhat I Would Like For Mother’s Day
About eight years ago I had the privilege of being at a conference that was mostly a waste of time, until the last day when I found myself at a round-table with Patron Saint of Relationship Wisdom, Dr. Esther Perel. I couldn’t tell you what someone like Esther was doing at this godforsaken conference, but I’m thrilled…
Read MoreThe Invention of The “Hysterical” Woman
I’m reading a fantastic book you need to add to your list called, Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft. It’s about abuse. I know, light reading for your morning, but stay with me. I’d heard it recommended before but didn’t think it was relevant to my life. I was wrong. Something I learned…
Read MoreThe Media’s Integrity Problem
Last week, I shared that I had experienced an unexpected and very sudden divorce. What I didn’t share was thanks to the very public nature of my ex-husband’s job, I had a front-row seat to the vitriolic and unethical world of politics and media – and the absolutely corrupt and coordinated relationship between them. I…
Read MoreThe Subversive Power of Knowing Your Own Mind
I recently was thrust unexpectedly and unwillingly back into the world of dating. As someone curious about human psychology, it’s been a fascinating gift of content and anthropologic insight. But as a human being with thoughts, feelings, needs, and wants – especially one conditioned as a cishet female – it is horrible. The actual dating…
Read More